OVERVIEW OF MARRIAGE, DIVORCE & REMARRIAGE
By Dennis Schmidt 9/2012
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Discusses is the subject of marriage, divorce and remarriage in the Bible. This is a very complex subject in which scripture does not give answers for every circumstance. This paper shows some guidelines on the subject. Each person involved should study God's word & hear from God what they should do. God is our judge, we are to strive to please Him. First test is what would Jesus do.
NEW CHRISTIAN: A person who becomes born again has all past sins forgiven & forgotten by God. They starts their Christian life from that point clean. They are to use 1 John 1:9 when they sins. They are imputed with the righteousness (perfect standing with the Father) of Christ. The Bible was written to Christians. The scriptures do not relate to unbelievers since the natural man is not interested in Christ centered things. When people becomes Christians they are to live by the Bible standards. A Christian family should not end in a divorce. They are to forgiven, forgotten by God, & the Christian is to be reconciled to each other.
A Christian is given faith to believe the imputed righteous of God, by grace, not of his works for his salvation.
PURPOSE OF THE WORD OF GOD: God's Word (Bible) is not to destroy, but produce life.
God's Word is sent to change lives & provides hope for the Christian.
GOD MARRIED ISRAEL. THE CHURCH IS THE BETROTHAL BRIDE OF CHRIST:
God instituted marriage to produce a one flesh to represent, His oneness as an example, in man & woman as Christ & the Church. Israel is God's wife.
GOD'S PERFECT PLAN FOR MARRIAGE: Two become one flesh for a life commitment.
Woman is partner so man is not alone & a help meet to the man.
Jesus & Church as Jesus & Father are one. Gods grace is needed today as this scripture is before man's first sin. Just as Adam was told not to sin or he would die.
GOD'S PURPOSE FOR MARRIAGE: A life time commitment in a shared union.
The wife & husband are to share their experiences as one flesh, to produce children, to be an example to their children, & train their children to know the Lord. Multiply & replenish the earth.
The husband duties include providing for the family. He is to be the: leader, priest (servant), and spiritual influence. He is to train his children in the Lord while honoring & loving his wife/children.
The wife is to be the help meet to her husband. The wife is to submit to her husband, to love, to honor, to care for him, the children, & the household. She is to guide the children & teach them.
ENGAGEMENT & BETROTHAL: The promise of commitment is equal to the marriage. The two later consummate the betrothal in a sexual union. A sexual act before marriage is fornication.
WIFE WHILE YOUNG: Often the children were espoused to a future union by their parents.
God witness the union.
JOSEPH (BRIDEGROOM) PREPARES FOR MARY (BRIDE) HIS ESPOUSED: Mary is Joseph's wife. Joseph married Mary before they went to Bethlehem so Jesus is Joseph son.
Joseph was Mary's husband during the betrothal period before the marriage ceremony. He prepared a home, during this period, then returned for her.
JESUS (BRIDEGROOM) PREPARES A HOUSE FOR THE CHURCH (BRIDE):
This is the Jewish wedding practice. The new Jerusalem is where the bride wll live.
MARRIAGE COMMITMENT: Two become one flesh for a life time experience. A commitment to love ones mate is possible on the same bases as a baby that is brought into a home. The baby is loved even though the child is self centered, keeps the parents awake, and needs diapers to be changed. In the same way a dog is brought home and loved. It barks, it is dirty, and it needs to be taken for walks in all types of weather. Love develops on the good points. The bad points with their experiences are forgiven, forgotten, and ignored.
They are one flesh & joined as one. Therefore, they are not two any longer. The Christian wife should not leave or be put out by the Christian husband since God has made them one flesh for life. If she leaves or gets a divorce she is to remain unmarried or return to her one & only husband.
The Christian should not leave since God may use them to convert the unbeliever. God compares Christ to the Church with a marriage of a man to a woman.
OLD TESTAMENT SCRIPTURES ON MARRIAGE & THEIR COMMITMENT: God's plan was always the two being one flesh. Divorce had occurred, so God used Moses laws to regulate those divorce and remarriage people. Divorce was not required. The Old Testament only allowed three reasons for divorce: (Religious & Sexual) incompatibility's & death.
What made people married? Woman's father approval, the couple & followed by the sexual union. Divorce was permitted: First, if the woman was not sexually pure as promise by the parents.
Second, if the woman's religious influence the Jewish man or his children against Judaism or God. In Israel today, only a man can divorce his wife. Judaism allowed remarriage.
ADULTERY WAS PUNISH BY DEATH TO THE GUILTY: Both parties were put to death by stoning. Betrothed unto a husband makes her his wife. Both the adulterer & adulteress mates can remarry after the executions.
FATHER DECIDES, DOWRY, RAPE, MARRIAGE BY SEXUAL UNION & DIVORCE:
The usual endowed payment of fifty <shekels> of silver is given to the father for his daughter in marriage. After a sexual union, dowry is paid even if no marriage. A raped salve is punished & man must pay sin offer. Woman raped becomes wife/can never divorce
SEPARATION OF FAMILIES, DIVORCES, & REMARRIAGE:
He can stay as servant since his slave wife and children are not free to go.
A captured woman from Israel's enemies can be made his wife. If she is divorced, she is to become a free woman. Religious divorce because unbelieving woman is teaching children about false gods. Ezar, had Jews leave foreign wives & maybe children also.
GOD DIVORCED JUDAH, HIS WIFE; WHEN SHE REPENTED GOD RETURNED:
God gave northern Israel her bill of divorce. However, God took her back after she repented.
God compares man's divorce wives in Deuteronomy 24:1-4 with going after other gods. Yet Israel can come back to the Lord. Religious adultery leads to God's divorce from Judah.
Divorce was temporary for only a limited period of time with Judah repenting.
PRIEST WIFE: God's man must marry from same religion, family, virgin, & pure woman.
KEY OLD TESTAMENT SCRIPTURE QUOTED BY JESUS IN MATTHEW 5 & 19
Two Judaism teachings: One conservative school (Shammai) allowed divorce for sexual uncleanness reasons only. Another more liberal school (Hillel 60 BC - 20 AD) believed a divorce of the wife is allowed for any reason whatsoever.
Uncleanness: Woman as promise by parents was not pure. The two may never remarry if divorced. Bill of divorce protects her from adultery.
NEW TESTAMENT SCRIPTURES ON MARRIAGE & THEIR COMMITMENT:
What made people married? Commitment to the marriage by parent's, woman's father, & maybe couple. Sexual union would follow. Marriage may of occurred from a sexual union.
When was divorce permitted? Possibly, if the mate was not pure, or the unbeliever left & divorced.
When was remarriage allowed? Death to mate, but only to another Christian. Otherwise, it is not clearly taught in scripture for any other cause. For two believers, they would have to remain single or be reconciled to each other. For the believer it may be possibly to remarry if the unbeliever mate leaves the marriage, gets divorced, and marries another person or committed fornication.
MARRIAGE BY UNION:A marriage/breakup may occur when people have had a sexual union.
Two one flesh in the sexual relationship. See Genesis 2:24 above. Fornication could break the original one flesh relationship.
SEPARATION OF FAMILIES & DIVORCES: Only for fornication (uncleanness). The mate who cause the separation, the divorced person who marries, and the person who marries the divorced person are living in a continual adultery relationship if the original couple were Christians.
Adultery committed by thought, word, or deed. Fornication: Maybe the same as Deuteronomy 24:1's uncleanness.
God allowed, by His law of Moses for divorce since hard hearted people were committing adultery which had a death penalty. The law did not require divorce. The law of Moses just regulated the divorce-remarriage.
2 BELIEVERS WHEN ONE BELIEVER SEPARATE OR DIVORCE REMAIN SINGLE:
For two Christians, if the wife departs then she is to remain unmarried or be reconciled to her one and only husband: No divorce or remarriage is allowed for the Christian marriage. The Christian wife should not leave or be put out by the Christian husband since God has made them one flesh for life.
MARRIAGE COMMITMENT BROKEN BY DEATH OF THE MARRIAGE PARTNER: The death of the marriage partner means they are no longer bound by the law of their marriage.
They are loosed to marry. Death to a marriage partner removes the marriage bond. A Christian who has been bound by the law is then at liberty to marry again but only to another Christian.
REMARRIAGE FOR BELIEVER WHEN UNBELIEVER MATE LEAVES: If the unbelieving depart, separate or divorces & remarries. The believer is not under bondage to remain single. The married pair were probably unbelievers until the husband came to the faith. The wife decides to leave because of her Christian husband's faith. For a new Christian, who has been married several times he is to remain with the present mate. However, if that unbelieving mate leave, separate, or divorces & remarries; then the believer is not under bondage to remain single.
Asunder & depart are from the same Greek base word. I Cor 7: Verse 15, has the unbeliever departed or put asunder the marriage. Verse 27, shows the man is divorced or loosed from his wife. Verse 28, shows that the man may marry again and this is not sinful.
ADULTERY & FORNICATION: Adultery is a sexual act between a man & a woman for which one or both are married to other people. Fornication is any unclean act, including adultery, between a person or object (woman/man, same sex as person, child, close relative, animal or idol as work, family, activity, as another god). See Leviticus 20:10-22 & Deuteronomy 22:22-30 for more sinful examples. The Christian is to love with their whole heart, mind, body one God, Jesus.
SUMMARY OF SOME ISSUES FOR MARRIAGE, DIVORCE, & REMARRIAGE:
All scriptures below are shown in the paper. Note: Christians are not to use the Old Testament law as they are under the New Testament principles.
WHEN IS A PERSON MARRIED? Varies between sexual union, betrothal & marriage service.
HAVE PEOPLE BEEN DIVORCED FOR UNCLEANNESS OR ANY CAUSE? Uncleanness (fornication)
DO SOME PEOPLE WHO DIVORCE & REMARRY LIVE IN CONTINUED SIN? Yes,
Unbelievers who divorce & remarry. Christian who divorce & remarry another person.
ARE SOME PEOPLE WHO DIVORCED BEEN PERMITTED TO REMARRY? Yes.
Fornication could be a possible exception to God's desired plan of the two being one flesh. This could break asunder the marriage if the unbeliever who desires to leave gets married to another.
ARE PEOPLE WHO DIVORCED & REMARRIED, NEVER ALLOWED TO MARRY THE FIRST PERSON AGAIN? Sometimes.
HAS GOD DIVORCED A NATION FOR UNCLEANNESS? Yes, northern Israel
ARE NEW CHRISTIANS TO LEAVE THEIR PRESENT MATE IF THEY HAD REMARRIED & RETURN TO THEIR FIRST MATE? No,
Every sin committed prior to being born again is forgiven & forgotten by God. The Christian starts their new life clean. The Christian abides in the state (marriage also) he was called by God.
All past sins, including divorce & remarriage. When the person becomes a Chriatian, they are not to leave their present mate.
HAS GOD DIVIDED PEOPLE INCLUDING CHRISTIANS FOR RELIGIOUS ERROR Yes. Only if the unbeliever leaves. The Christian is told to let the unbeliever leave, and not to initial the person leaving or to leave them. If the unbeliever leaves, the Christian is not under bondage but in peace.
ARE SOME PEOPLE INCLUDING TWO CHRISTIANS ALLOWED TO DIVORCE? No. They must forgive their partner, be reconciled to each other, and restore their relationship.
Christians are to forgive also. Two married Christians are to reconcile with partner.
Brother equal to husband or wife. A person can't be a Christian if they can not love who they see.
BIBLE CONCLUSION FOR CHRISTIAN MARRIAGE, DIVORCE & REMARRIAGE:
God hates divorce. He has made the two to become one flesh. Christians are not to get divorced because they represent Jesus to the world. If they show divorce or failure in a relationship, Christianity shows it can not succeed to the unbeliever. Christians are to forgive their partner's sins, reconcile to each other, and restore the relationship. God's love & forgiveness is to prevail.
God's power, Holy Spirit within, & Bible influence enables the Christian to fulfill God's love.
We are to have one marriage.
The Husband & wife love relationship are compared to Christ & the Church which are fulfilled in the same scripture as Genesis 2:24.
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